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I did the googleism found on a comment in her journal. I've kept only the ones that really amuse me....and to top that list:

onyx is a game of sexual exploration designed for two to six consenting adults - Really? Wow! I'm sure I'll be a hit at parties...
onyx is environmentally friendly - Nice to know I won't be kicked out of the zoo
onyx is affordable yet it lends a look of great wealth to its wearers - So..who wants to try me on first?
onyx is the color of pain - Masochists love me!
onyx is a unique blend - Indeed, I am :)
onyx is a passionate person who works hard and plays hard - I try
onyx is back? - I was gone?
onyx is ranked highest by industry analysts - Yay! I'm the highest...
onyx is an easy - What?? I'm easy?? Why didn't anyone tell me?!
onyx is now being field tested in a mall - Am I any good?
onyx is a semi - Look out baby! Here I come!
onyx is a solid black male - *looks at herself* Uhm....
onyx is the one for you - Anything's possible!
onyx is stable - on my good days
onyx is your birthstone - Who's birthstone?

I think I like the first one the best ;)

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