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Jan. 6th, 2003

I have my letter all written out. I did it on break...but, now, I'm nervous about handing it over to my supe, and I don't know why. I haven't done it yet, my plan is to do it on lunch.
I don't understand why I'm nervous about handing it over. Maybe its a sign that I've failed again? Or that its final? I've never been good at change. This just cements that things *are* going to change..for better or worse, I won't be here anymore.
While this thought is a relief, its also a bit scarey. I mean, I've been here 2 years. I have a job that pays commission at the moment..what if? Yeah, I know, I shouldn't do that to myself. It has to be better..maybe not financially..but, better just the same.
We'll make it, I know we will..so, why am I so reluctant to do this?

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