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Turning over a new leaf....

I hope. I know I've said it before - complained about it multiple times. My weight.

I have noticed, recently, its effecting my self-esteem more than it used to. I don't feel beautiful or sexy when I look in the mirror - I feel fat. I hate that feeling. At the party this weekend, I almost avoided the hot tub, because the idea of people seeing me nude was ...well, not comforting, to say the least. And it wasn't my usual bout of modesty. I went in with my arms held over my stomach, as if to hide it from people. I'm tired of feeling this way, or having that desire.

So, I've decided to give weight loss another go. I've tried before, but have only done so half-heartedly, and have not, thus far managed to stick to a diet of any sort. I can't guarantee I'll do better this time, but I'm certainly going to try! Besides, this time isn't so much of a 'diet'. I just need to change my eating habits a little bit at a time and become healthier. Not to mention, I need to increase my activity.

So, knowing what to do, I've begun already. I've begun tracking my excersize and food at myfitnesspal.com - linked in swade's journal. I think, so far, I'm doing pretty good. I haven't had to cut out any foods, or anything that drastic. I haven't even had to cut out my soda, though I am trying to cut back on that. I am trying to drink more water as well.

This morning, even though it isn't tracked (mostly because I'm not sure where to add pilates), I did some pilates. Or, I tried. I did stick with the attempt for 30 minutes. I think, though, that I'm going to have to find something else. Not because the excersizes are too difficult, per se, but because a lot are done on your back with your legs in "table" position. Which is where you lift your legs, bending them at the knee like you're going to bring them to your chest. I discovered that there's a spot on my back, near the tailbone, that hurts when I do that. I'm not talking a little bit of muscle groaning and protest because they aren't used to being used. Oh, no...I'm talking bone hurting enough to bring tears to my eyes. I fear that the yoga dvd I have, which is given by the same instructor, will hold many of the same types of positions - and I can't do that kind of pain. It was a bit discouraging, to say the least. I'm looking into purchasing yoga booty ballet or hip hop abs (yeah, I know, too many informercials). They look fun actually....and though it may be hard to keep up at first, I think I can do it.

Anyway, wish me luck!


( 13 comments — Drop A Feather )
Jun. 5th, 2007 05:01 pm (UTC)
You sound a lot like me. I am picky about the exercise videos. I don't know what the Snohomish LIbrary is like, but the KCLS one has a ton. I went through and borrowed a whole bunch of different ones to try out. Most of them I did not like, but I found a few I did, and a few instructors who did not make me want to throttle them for their perkiness. Then I bought a couple that I knew I'd like, since I already had tried them out. P.S. I'm having my first luck ever losing wait, I've lost 16 so far. I'm tracking it too, though through weight watchers online.

Good luck!
Jun. 5th, 2007 07:58 pm (UTC)
Ohhh! Congrats on that!! That's a significant amount!!

I'll see about the library - maybe they have hip hop abs..LOL
Jun. 5th, 2007 05:49 pm (UTC)
Lotsa luck!!

I am going to try and give you a call tonight! :-)
Jun. 5th, 2007 07:59 pm (UTC)
Erm..uh...oh...I'm a poor girl - thus the cell phone is not paid yet, and suspended. Should be on again Thursday :(

I should be online tonight though :)
Jun. 5th, 2007 08:00 pm (UTC)
Fair enough, I'll come lookin' for ya!
Jun. 5th, 2007 10:10 pm (UTC)
FWIW, I wouldn't mind seeing you naked. :)
Jun. 6th, 2007 12:46 am (UTC)
with the hurting near the tailbone, you might want to try warm moist heat on the area before exercising and see if that helps, that is what my Physical therapist did after the alst auto accident when I was in for PT. then ice afterwards.
Jun. 6th, 2007 12:47 am (UTC)
Hmmm, exercise.... ponders waving La Blue girl live action dvds infront of Onyx and having her follow him on a walk -grin-
Jun. 7th, 2007 05:30 pm (UTC)
Let Me see you naked and I'll come up with wonderful flowery compliments to make you feel better. Hell I haven't seen you clothed in a long time.
Jun. 9th, 2007 12:08 am (UTC)
Uh..you know, I had to read that twice to get what you meant. LOL
So many ways to take that!!

Well, the children are being picked up by family members more often on the weekends now - maybe we can plan something.
Jun. 9th, 2007 01:26 am (UTC)
that's why I said it like that! How old are the kids now? Something would be nice, not sure what we'd do anymore now though lol. Guess we never really did lol.
Jun. 7th, 2007 10:16 pm (UTC)
I've been having difficulties with that myself. :-( I need to lose weight for health reasons, especially with the a-fib. :(

BTW, I've been to many a pool party and thin folks are just not there. And I'd rather see you naked as opposed to Paris Hilton. :)

And... The next pool party is on the 17th, you game? ;-)

I miss you! :)

Jun. 9th, 2007 12:10 am (UTC)
Don't know if I could.

It isn't so much that I want to be skinny. Let's face it, I'm German and Norwiegan - very few of that stock get away with a size 2 (or less) and look good! I'd look like I was starving - which isn't exactly appealing to me either!!
( 13 comments — Drop A Feather )